Earlier this month, I took self care to a whole new level, especially for myself. All my kids left for a week of overnight camp, and with their dad, and I... took the whole week off... to do SWEET. FUCK. ALL. Yes, I did. Me, the Queen of never stop, go go go, took time off for herself, and it was GLORIOUS!!
Honestly though, when I first realized I was actually going to get a whole week to myself, I thought about doing ALL THE THINGS. It has been years since I have spent more then a night or two away from my kids, and I saw myself cramming late nights and early mornings writing a new book draft, blogs, short stories, attending events, seeing ALL my friends and going ALL the places.
But who was I trying to fool? Myself? Didn't I just have a couple near breakdowns and health issues related to stress this year alone?
In the end, I didn't end up doing much of any of that, other than doctors appointments and stuff I was 110% committed to, and I am not even apologizing for anything that I may have missed that week. I love you all, and if I missed something, let's make it up this fall, ok?
I really needed that time. Not just to focus on me, but to UNfocus on everything else around me too, and to take all the shit off my plate that had no business being there in the first place.
I truly wasn't a central focus point in my own life, wasn't giving myself all that self love I love to preach about. I KNOW how beneficial it is for you, because I was showing all the signs of what happens when you let that self love deplete.
Life is funny huh, in the midst of creating a series of self love type workshops, and life pushed me through it firsthand.
So that was my focus that week. And it was what my soul needed more than ANYTHING.
I now have a list, and I highly encourage each and everyone of you reading this to make one too, if you don't have one already, of the top 10-15 of my absolute favorite things that I love to do more than anything.
That week earlier this month, I crossed pretty much every single thing off of that list, some more than once. Improvising was key though. I mean, I didn't take off to a beach in Jamaica somewhere ;)
That ol' cliché, that you cannot pour from an empty cup, it's not a cliché. Try filling yours up to the brim sometime, and you will be surprised.
But... self care ISN'T just hot bubble baths, although I had myself a ton of those that week, haha.
It's saying YES to what your soul needs. WHEN you need it. Whatever that is. Rest. Laughter. Physical touch. Food. Exercise. Organization. Housework help. Music. Dance. Love. Nature. Help. Therapy. Animals. Whatever it is, you gotta do it. Give in to it. Allow it. That is self care.
Self care is also NOT doing the things you hate, especially if you really don't have to. Those things you say yes to for other people, when your gut is screaming out NOOOO!! It means eliminating the people who are toxic or unhealthy for you, clearing up the junk and clutter, making sure you are saying no to too much unhealthy food and habits, etc. Making sure you aren't dehydrated. Making sure you are not buying your own excuses. I have been very guilty of that.
I have felt really refreshed and recharged since mid August. And not only that, but thanks to this intense dive into self care, plus therapy of all kinds lately, I am armed with all sorts of tools to help me plan going forward to stay this way.
I am so excited for the big changes I am making, and the changes coming. I am working on some awesome things right now!! :)
So, in closing, first, I really want to thank you all for being a part of my life. That means the world to me.
Secondly, I really encourage you all to find a little quiet time and sit down with your amazing selves. Breathe deep, focus, and think about all the things that truly make you happy, that light you up inside.
Write down a list of those things..
Do them. Do them all at once, or schedule a few in every day, or every week, depending on your emotional level. But do them.
Pour into your cup!!
All my love,
Author Carissa McIntyre,
Lady Mack xo